Questions about Confession
Hwhat is Confession?
- Confession is the great Sacrament of reconciliation between God and man, the manifestation of God’s love for man. At confession, the believer confesses his sins in the presence of a priest and through him receives forgiveness of sins from the Lord Jesus Christ Himself.
Why do you need to confess?
Through Confession, the purity of the soul that was lost due to sins returns. This Sacrament restores the state received in Baptism. Sin is dirt, and confession is a bath that washes the soul from spiritual dirt.
How to prepare for the first Confession?
When preparing for confession, you need to test your conscience, remember the sins committed in deed, word, feeling and thought for the entire time after Baptism. A person must think through all this and realize what he has sinned against himself, against his neighbors, against God and the Church and repent. Self-condemnation is the first and most important thing with which to come to Confession. If necessary, you can write down your sins so as not to miss anything during confession.
When preparing for confession, it is useful to read the books: “Helping the Penitent” by St. Ignatius Bryanchaninov, “On the Eve of Confession” by Priest Grigory Dyachenko or “The Experience of Constructing a Confession” by Archimandrite John (Krestyankin), which will help you realize and see forgotten and unconscious sins. But there is no need to copy sins from books; confession should be completely personal.
What should someone who wants to begin Confession know?
Confession must first be started by reconciling with everyone. At Confession, you need to talk only about your sins, not justify yourself, not condemn others, and ask the Lord for forgiveness for your sins. You should never become despondent from realizing the gravity of your sins, for there are no unforgivable sins, except those that have not been confessed and unrepentant. If for some reason the priest does not have the opportunity to listen in detail, then there is no need to be embarrassed by this. It is important to recognize yourself as guilty before God, to have contrition and self-reproach in your heart. But if some sin lies like a stone on your conscience, then you need to ask the priest to listen in detail.
Confession is not a conversation. If you need to consult with a priest, you should ask him to set aside another time for this
You can start Confession at any time and preferably as often as possible. Confession before Communion is mandatory.
How to overcome shame at Confession?
The feeling of shame at Confession is natural; it was given by God to keep a person from repeating the sin. Understanding that the Church is a physician, and not a court of justice, can help overcome shame. The Lord “does not want the sinner to die, but that the sinner should turn from his way and live” (Ezek. 33:11). “A sacrifice to God is a broken spirit, a contrite and humble heart God will not humble” (Ps. 50:19).
At a doctor’s appointment, a person is not ashamed to talk about his physical illnesses, and at Confession there is no need to be ashamed to reveal his mental illnesses to the priest. There is no other way to heal the soul.
Are Repentance and Confession the same thing?
Repentance (translated from Greek as “change of mind”) is a change in lifestyle through a change in mind and way of thinking: from awareness of untruth - through repentance - to change. Therefore, true repentance is rebirth, internal restructuring, renewal and rebirth of life. Repentance is not a single act of repentance, but a constant, daily act. Repentance is an expression of readiness for spiritual work, for collaboration with God in the name of gaining Paradise.
Repentance implies, first of all, an internal re-evaluation of oneself, a certain critical introspection, the ability to look at oneself from the outside, condemn one’s sins, and surrender oneself to the justice and mercy of God. Repentance is the awareness of one’s sin, the untruth of one’s own life, the recognition that in one’s deeds and thoughts a person has deviated from the moral norm that God put into his nature. Awareness of this is the greatest virtue and at the same time the key to changing life for the better.
Saint Theophan the Recluse defines repentance by four things: 1) awareness of one’s sin before God; 2) reproach ourselves in this sin with full confession of our guilt, without shifting responsibility to demons, other people or circumstances; 3) the determination to leave sin, to hate it, not to return to it, not to give it room in oneself; 4) prayer to God for forgiveness of sin, until the spirit is pacified.
Confession is confession of one's sins (orally or sometimes in writing) in front of a priest as a witness. This is part of the Sacrament of Repentance, during which a repentant person, through the priest reading a special prayer and the sign of the Cross, receives permission (liberation) from sins and forgiveness from God Himself.
At what age should a child confess?
Usually children go to confession from the age of 7. But it is advisable to prepare children for the first confession in advance. Starting from 5-6 years old, bring them to
priest for a confidential conversation, so that they acquire the skill of realizing their wrongdoings.
When does confession take place - before or after the service?
In different churches, confession is performed at different times. Somewhere they don’t confess at all in the morning, and somewhere, on the contrary, they confess only in the morning. Somewhere only before the service, and somewhere during and after the service, both in the morning and in the evening. You can find out about the time of confession in your church by asking directly from the staff of your church.
In our church you can go to confession every morning and evening. But it is better to confess in the evening during the evening service after 18.30. In the morning during the Liturgy you can confess only as a last resort. During the summer holidays and during Lent, confession may be canceled on weekday evenings. Confession always takes place on Saturday during the All-Night Vigil at about 6 p.m.
What is sin, how to destroy it?
Sin is a violation of God's commandments, a crime against God's law, committed voluntarily or involuntarily. The primary source of sin is the fallen world, man is the conductor of sin. The Holy Fathers distinguish the following stages of involvement in sin: preposition (sinful thought, desire); combination (acceptance of this sinful thought, retention of attention on it); captivity (enslavement to this sinful thought, agreement with it); falling into sin (doing in practice what was proposed by a sinful thought).
The fight against sin begins with the awareness of oneself as a sinner and the desire to resist sin and correct oneself. Sin is destroyed by repentance with the assistance of the grace of the Holy Spirit, which is taught to believers in the Sacraments of the Church.
What is the difference between sin and passion?
Passion is a bad habit, a skill, an attraction to sinful action, and sin is the very action of passion, its satisfaction in thoughts, words and deeds. You can have passions, but not act on them, not commit a sinful act. Confront your passions, fight them - this is one of the main tasks in the life of a Christian.
What sins are called mortal?
There is a list of mortal sins, however, it can be argued that any sin that completely enslaves the will of a person is mortal.
“The mortal sins for a Christian are the following: heresy, schism, blasphemy, apostasy, sorcery, despair, suicide, fornication, adultery, unnatural fornication, incest, drunkenness, sacrilege, homicide, robbery, theft and any cruel, inhuman offense.
Only one of these sins - suicide - cannot be cured by repentance, but each of them mortifies the soul and makes it incapable of eternal bliss until it cleanses itself with satisfactory repentance...
Let him who has fallen into mortal sin not fall into despair! Let him resort to the medicine of repentance, to which he is called until the last minute of his life by the Savior, who proclaimed in the Holy Gospel: “He who believes in Me, even if he dies, will live” (John 11:25). But it’s disastrous to remain in mortal sin, it’s disastrous when mortal sin turns into a habit!” (St. Ignatius Brianchaninov).
Are all people sinners?
- “There is not a righteous man on earth who does good and does not sin” (Eccl. 7:20). Human nature was damaged by the fall of the first people, so people cannot live a life without sin. One God without sin. All people sin a lot before God. But some recognize themselves as sinners and repent, while others do not see their sins. The Apostle John the Theologian writes: “If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, then He, being faithful and righteous, will forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:8-9).
Condemnation, vanity, self-justification, idle talk, hostility, ridicule, intransigence, laziness, irritability, anger are constant companions of human life. On the conscience of many lie even more serious sins: infanticide (abortion), adultery, contact with sorcerers and psychics, envy, theft, enmity, revenge and much more”;
Why is Adam and Eve's sin called original?
Sin is called original because it was committed by the first people (ancestors) - Adam (forefather) and Eve (foremother) - from whom the first human race originated. Original sin was the beginning for all subsequent human sins.
Why should all the numerous descendants of Adam and Eve be held responsible for their fall?
The fall of the first people damaged their spiritual and physical nature. All people, like the descendants of Adam and Eve, have the same damaged nature, easily inclined to sin.
In the patristic understanding, sin is a disease of the soul. And in the liturgical practice of the Orthodox Church, this understanding of sin is expressed in numerous prayers.
With this definition of sin, it is easy to understand why descendants suffer due to the fall of their ancestors. Today everyone knows that a number of serious diseases are inherited. No one is surprised that children of alcoholics, for example, may have a hereditary predisposition to alcoholism, not to mention a whole bunch of concomitant diseases. And if sin is a disease, it may well be inherited.
In the Sacrament of Baptism, the human soul is freed from original sin, since our Lord Jesus Christ, by His death on the Cross, atoned for the sin of Adam.
What is necessary for the forgiveness of sins?
For the forgiveness of sins, the person confessing requires reconciliation with all his neighbors, sincere contrition for sins and their full confession, a firm intention to correct himself, faith in the Lord Jesus Christ and hope for His mercy.
Does God forgive all sins?
There is no unforgivable sin except that which is not repented of. God's mercy is so great that the thief, having repented, was the first to enter the Kingdom of God. No matter how many sins there are and no matter how great they are, God has even more mercy, because just as He Himself is infinite, so His mercy is infinite.
How do you know if a sin is forgiven?
If the priest reads the prayer of permission, then the sin is forgiven. But sins tend to leave behind some kind of scars. Sometimes sin continues to torment us, or pops up in our memories. Sometimes he becomes attractive to us again, and we fall into this sin again. In the latter cases, our repentance was incomplete, since sin was never completely expelled from our lives. Therefore, you need to go to confession again and repent of it.
Is it necessary to confess the same thing several times?
sin?
If it is committed again, then you need to confess it again. If this sin has not been repeated again, then there is no need to talk about it.
Is it possible to tell not all sins in confession?
Before performing the Sacrament of Repentance, the priest reads a prayer with the following content: “Son, Christ stands invisibly, accepting your confession. Do not be ashamed, do not be afraid and do not hide anything from me, but tell everything you have sinned without being embarrassed, and you will receive remission of sins from our Lord Jesus Christ. Here is His icon before us: I am only a witness, and everything that you tell me, I will testify before Him. If you hide anything from me, your sin will worsen. Understand that once you have come to the hospital, do not leave it unhealed!”
If someone hides their sins at Confession because of false shame, or because of pride, or because of a lack of faith, or simply because they do not understand the importance of repentance, then they come out of Confession not only not cleansed of sins, but even more burdened them. Earthly life is short-lived and a person can pass into eternity without having time to fully confess.
Confessed sin, as it were, becomes outside the soul, leaves it - just as a splinter taken out of the body becomes outside the body and ceases to harm it.
Is it useful to confess often?
Through frequent confession, sin loses its power. Frequent Confession turns away from sin, protects from evil, confirms goodness, maintains vigilance, and keeps from repeating sins. And unconfessed sins become habitual and cease to weigh on the conscience. But You need to treat the sacrament of Repentance with reverence, not turn it into a petty habit and confuse it with the daily revelation of thoughts in monasteries.
Is it necessary to repent before a priest? Does it matter which one?
The Sacrament of Repentance is performed in the presence of a priest. This is a necessary condition. But the priest is only a witness, and the true celebrant is the Lord God. The priest is a prayer book, an intercessor before the Lord and a witness that the divinely established Sacrament of Confession occurs in a legal manner.
It is not difficult to list your sins alone with yourself before the All-Knowing and Invisible God. But discovering them in the presence of a priest requires considerable effort to overcome shame, pride, and recognition of one’s sinfulness, and this leads to an incomparably deeper and more serious result. This is the moral aspect of Confession.
For a person truly suffering from the ulcer of sin, it makes no difference through whom he confesses this tormenting sin - as long as he confesses it as soon as possible and receives relief. The most important thing in Confession is not the personality of the priest receiving it, but the state of the soul of the penitent, his sincere repentance, leading to awareness of sin, heartfelt contrition and rejection of the offense committed.
Can a priest tell anyone the contents of Confession?
The Church obliges priests to keep the secret of Confession. For violating this rule, a clergyman may be defrocked.
Is fasting necessary before Confession?
When preparing for Confession, according to the Church Charter, fasting and a special prayer rule are not required; faith and awareness of one’s sins, and the desire to free oneself from them are required.
Fasting is necessary if there is an intention to take communion after Confession. You should consult with the priest in advance about the extent of fasting before Communion.
Is it necessary to confess in the morning before Communion if you confessed the day before?
If you remember a forgotten grave sin, then it would be good to confess again before proceeding to Communion.
If between Confession and Communion you sinned in word or deed, for example, you quarreled with someone or desecration occurred in a dream, then you need to confess. But if you only had thoughts or other less serious sins, then you do not need to confess in the morning, provided that you have internal repentance and intention to reconcile with everyone.
On the morning before Communion, you should not take up the priest’s time with your Confession. Give the opportunity to confess to those who were unable to come to Confession the day before - the infirm and parents with small children.
What if after Confession, right before Communion, a sin was remembered, but there is no longer an opportunity to confess? Should I postpone Communion?
This sin should be spoken about at Confession in the near future.
There is no need to postpone Communion, but approach the Chalice with a repentant feeling and awareness of your unworthiness.
Is it necessary to take communion after confession? Can I confess and leave?
It is not necessary to receive communion after confession. You can sometimes come to church just for confession. But for those who want to receive Communion, they need to confess, preferably the day before, or even a few days before Communion.
What should sick people do who cannot come to church for Confession and Communion?
Their relatives can come to the church and ask the priest for Confession and Communion for the sick person at home.
What is penance?
Penance (translated from Greek as “punishment”) is a spiritual medicine, a means of assistance in the fight against sin, a method of healing a repentant sinner, which consists in performing deeds of piety, determined by his confessor. This can be making bows, reading prayers, canons or akathists, intense fasting, a pilgrimage to a holy place - depending on the strengths and capabilities of the penitent. Penance must be performed strictly, and only the priest who imposed it can cancel it.
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Each of us has a moment in life when we want to relieve our soul and pour it out to someone. You don’t want to burden your relatives with your problems, and you don’t want to trust strangers with your secrets. Who then should I open up to? Every believer knows what confession is. During it, you can reveal all your secrets to the Lord and they will not be known to anyone.
Everyone who decides to go to confession for the first time thinks about how to behave correctly? How to correctly name sins in confession? It happens that people come to confession and talk in great detail about all their life’s ups and downs. This is not considered a confession. Confession includes the concept of repentance. This is not at all a story about your life, and even with the desire to justify your sins.
Since some people simply do not know how to confess differently, the priest will accept this version of confession. But it will be more correct if you try to understand the situation and admit to all your mistakes.
Many people list their sins for confession. In it they try to list everything in detail and talk about everything. But there is another type of people who list their sins only in separate words. It is necessary to describe your sins not in general terms about the passion that is seething in you, but about its manifestation in your life.
Remember, confession should not be a detailed account of the incident, but should be repentance for certain sins. But you shouldn’t be particularly dry in describing these sins, writing off with only one word.
How to name sins in confession?
Often people try to find the exact name for their sin. Remember that sins must be called by the words that exist in modern language. It will be better if you repent in your natural words from the bottom of your heart, and not in words memorized from books. You must understand what you are talking about.
Everyone knows that there are 8 passions. And if you have violated the commandments in relation to these passions, then it is imperative to repent of this.
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Example of sins in confession:
- fornication
- love of money
- gluttony
- sadness
- pride
- vanity
- despondency
Each of them needs to be repented differently. There are sins that you don’t need to talk about in detail, but you need to clearly let the priest understand the extent of your sin. But in the case of the sins of vanity, pride, theft, it is necessary to remember such cases and, if necessary, remind yourself of such cases.
What to do before coming to confession
- Realize your sins. First of all, you must realize your own sins. What is sin? This is an act that is contrary to God's will. Most often, a summary of the will of the Lord regarding people can be found in the famous Ten Commandments.
- Do not use the “sin list”. Many churchgoers say that the use of such lists during confession turns it into a formal listing of their misdeeds. But if you are still afraid of missing something during the sacrament, then it is better to make yourself a small reminder.
A believer needs to know how to correctly write sins for confession. To do this, you can use the following hint:
- Sins that were committed against the Lord God (nominal faith, disbelief in God, superstition, turning to various fortune telling, creating “idols”).
- Sins against oneself and one’s neighbor (judgment and discussion of the shortcomings of loved ones, neglect of people, abortion, various kinds of prodigal sins, cowardice, neglect of raising children, lies of various kinds, appropriation of other people’s property, drunkenness and other addictions, laziness, envy, neglect of one’s own health , greed, reluctance to change your life, desire for a “beautiful life”, indifference to other people)
- Talk only about sins and your own
- Do not invent a special church language
- Talk about serious things, not trifles
- Try to change your life even before confession
- Try to live peacefully with everyone
First, before confession, it is advisable to find out when it is being held. It happens that there are a lot of people willing. Then it would be better to contact the priest personally and ask to schedule a separate time for you. It may be that during confession the priest may assign you penance.
This is not a punishment, it is simply a method to completely eradicate sin and receive forgiveness for it. It has its own expiration date. Basically, after confession, communion occurs. That is why it is recommended to combine preparation for repentance with preparation for communion.
List of sins for confession for women
The list of sins for women is not particularly different from the list of men, but there are still certain differences. For example: performing an abortion. This is considered a grave sin, even if it was done for medical reasons.
It is believed that problems of an unborn child may arise due to diseases that are sexually transmitted. This means the relationship may not be pure and permanent. It is for this sin that one must ask for forgiveness and repent of it. It is also necessary for the one who could advise or push the woman to take such a step to repent.
The complete list of sins for confession for women consists of 473 items.
1. She violated the rules of conduct for those praying in the holy temple.
2. I had dissatisfaction with my life and with people.
3. She performed prayers without zeal and bowed low to icons, prayed lying down, sitting (unnecessarily, out of laziness).
4. She sought glory and praise in virtues and works.
5. I was not always content with what I had: I wanted to have beautiful, varied clothes, furniture, and delicious food.
6. I was annoyed and offended when my wishes were denied.
7. I did not abstain with my husband during pregnancy, on Wednesdays, Fridays and Sundays, during fasting, and was in uncleanness by consent with my husband.
8. I sinned with disgust.
9. After committing a sin, she did not repent immediately, but kept it to herself for a long time.
10. She sinned with idle talk and indirectness. I remembered the words others had said against me and sang shameless worldly songs.
11. She grumbled about the bad road, the length and tediousness of the service.
12. I used to save money for a rainy day, as well as for funerals.
13. She was angry with her loved ones and scolded her children. She did not tolerate comments or fair reproaches from people, she immediately fought back.
14. She sinned with vanity, asking for praise, saying “you can’t praise yourself, no one will praise you.”
15. The deceased was remembered with alcohol; on a fast day the funeral table was modest.
16. Didn’t have a firm determination to give up sin.
17. I doubted the honesty of my neighbors.
18. I missed opportunities to do good.
19. She suffered from pride, did not condemn herself, and was not always the first to ask for forgiveness.
20. Allowed food spoilage.
21. She did not always keep the shrine reverently (artos, water, prosphora spoiled).
22. I sinned with the goal of “repenting.”
23. She objected, justifying herself, was irritated by the lack of understanding, stupidity and ignorance of others, made reprimands and comments, contradicted, divulged sins and weaknesses.
24. Attributed sins and weaknesses to others.
25. She succumbed to rage: she scolded her loved ones, insulted her husband and children.
26. Led others into anger, irritability, and indignation.
27. I sinned by judging my neighbor and tarnishing his good name.
28. Sometimes she became discouraged and carried her cross with a murmur.
29. Interfered in other people's conversations, interrupted the speaker's speech.
30. She sinned with grumpiness, compared herself with others, complained and became embittered at those who offended her.
31. Thanked people, did not look towards God with gratitude.
32. I fell asleep with sinful thoughts and dreams.
33. I noticed bad words and actions of people.
34. Drank and ate food that was harmful to health.
35. She was troubled in spirit by slander and considered herself better than others.
36. She sinned by indulgence and indulgence in sins, self-indulgence, self-indulgence, disrespect for old age, untimely eating, intransigence, inattention to requests.
37. I missed the opportunity to sow the word of God and bring benefit.
38. She sinned with gluttony, guttural rage: she loved to eat excessively, savor tasty morsels, and amused herself with drunkenness.
39. She was distracted from prayer, distracted others, gave off bad air in church, went out when necessary without telling about it in confession, and hastily prepared for confession.
40. She sinned with laziness, idleness, exploited other people’s labor, speculated in things, sold icons, did not go to church on Sundays and holidays, was lazy to pray.
41. She became bitter towards the poor, did not accept strangers, did not give to the poor, did not clothe the naked.
42. I trusted in man more than in God.
43. I was drunk at a party.
44. I did not send gifts to those who offended me.
45. I was upset at a loss.
46. I fell asleep during the day unnecessarily.
47. I was burdened by sorrows.
48. I didn’t protect myself from colds and didn’t get treatment from doctors.
49. She deceived me with her word.
50. Exploited the work of others.
51. She was depressed in sorrows.
52. She was a hypocrite, a people-pleaser.
53. She wished evil, was cowardly.
54. She was resourceful for evil.
55. Was rude and not condescending to others.
56. I didn’t force myself to do good deeds or pray.
57. She angrily reproached the authorities at rallies.
58. I shortened prayers, skipped them, rearranged words.
59. I envied others and wanted honor for myself.
60. I sinned with pride, vanity, self-love.
61. I watched dances, dances, various games and shows.
62. She sinned by idle ranting, secret eating, petrification, insensibility, neglect, disobedience, intemperance, stinginess, condemnation, love of money, reproach.
63. Spent the holidays in drinking and earthly amusements.
64. She sinned by sight, hearing, taste, smell, touch, inaccurate observance of fasts, unworthy communion of the Body and Blood of the Lord.
65. She got drunk and laughed at someone else’s sin.
66. She sinned through lack of faith, infidelity, betrayal, deceit, lawlessness, groaning over sin, doubt, freethinking.
67. She was fickle in good deeds and did not care about reading the Holy Gospel.
68. I came up with excuses for my sins.
69. She sinned by disobedience, arbitrariness, unfriendliness, malice, disobedience, insolence, contempt, ingratitude, severity, sneaking, oppression.
70. She did not always fulfill her official duties conscientiously; she was careless and hasty in her work.
71. She believed in signs and various superstitions.
72. Was an instigator of evil.
73. I went to weddings without a church wedding.
74. I sinned through spiritual insensibility: relying on myself, on magic, on fortune telling.
75. Did not keep these vows.
76. Concealed sins during confession.
77. I tried to find out other people’s secrets, read other people’s letters, eavesdropped on telephone conversations.
78. In great grief she wished for death.
79. Wore immodest clothes.
80. Talked during the meal.
81. She drank and ate the water “charged” by Chumak.
82. Worked through strength.
83. I forgot about my Guardian Angel.
84. I sinned by being lazy in praying for my neighbors; I did not always pray when asked to do so.
85. I was ashamed to cross myself among unbelievers, and took off the cross when going to the bathhouse and to see a doctor.
86. She did not keep the vows given at Holy Baptism and did not maintain the purity of her soul.
87. She noticed the sins and weaknesses of others, divulged and reinterpreted them for the worse. She swore, swore on her head, on her life. She called people “devil”, “Satan”, “demon”.
88. She called the dumb cattle after the names of holy saints: Vaska, Mashka.
89. I didn’t always pray before eating food; sometimes I had breakfast in the morning before the Divine service.
90. Having previously been an unbeliever, she seduced her neighbors into unbelief.
91. She set a bad example with her life.
92. I was lazy to work, shifting my labor onto the shoulders of others.
93. I did not always handle the word of God with care: I drank tea and read the Holy Gospel (which is lack of reverence).
94. Took Epiphany water after eating (unnecessarily).
95. I picked lilacs at the cemetery and brought them home.
96. I didn’t always keep the sacrament days, I forgot to read the prayers of thanks. I ate a lot these days and slept a lot.
97. I sinned by being idle, coming to church late and leaving it early, and rarely going to church.
98. Neglected menial work when absolutely necessary.
99. She sinned by indifference, remained silent when someone blasphemed.
100. She did not strictly observe fasting days, during fasts she was satiated with fasting food, she tempted others with the indulgence of something tasty and inaccurate according to the rules: a hot loaf, vegetable oil, seasoning.
101. I was carried away by bliss, relaxation, carelessness, trying on clothes and jewelry.
102. She reproached the priests and servants and spoke about their shortcomings.
103. Gave advice on abortion.
104. I disturbed someone else’s sleep through carelessness and impudence.
105. I read love letters, copied, memorized passionate poems, listened to music, songs, watched shameless movies.
106. She sinned with immodest glances, looked at other people’s nudity, wore immodest clothes.
107. I was tempted in a dream and passionately remembered it.
108. She suspected in vain (she slandered in her heart).
109. She retold empty, superstitious tales and fables, praised herself, and did not always tolerate the revealing truth and offenders.
110. Showed curiosity about other people's letters and papers.
111. Idly inquired about the weaknesses of my neighbor.
112. I have not freed myself from the passion to tell or ask about news.
113. I read prayers and akathists rewritten with errors.
114. I considered myself better and more worthy than others.
115. I don’t always light lamps and candles in front of icons.
116. I violated the secret of my own and others’ confession.
117. Participated in bad deeds, persuaded people to do bad things.
118. She was stubborn against goodness and did not listen to good advice. She showed off her beautiful clothes.
119. I wanted everything to be my way, I looked for the culprits of my sorrows.
120. After completing the prayer, I had evil thoughts.
121. She spent money on music, cinema, the circus, sinful books and other amusements, and lent money for a deliberately bad cause.
122. In thoughts inspired by the enemy, she plotted against the Holy Faith and the Holy Church.
123. She disturbed the peace of mind of the sick, looked at them as sinners, and not as a test of their faith and virtue.
124. Yielded to untruth.
125. I ate and went to bed without praying.
126. I ate before mass on Sundays and holidays.
127. She spoiled the water when she bathed in the river from which she drank.
128. She talked about her exploits, labors, and boasted about her virtues.
129. I enjoyed using scented soap, cream, powder, and painted my eyebrows, nails and eyelashes.
130. I sinned with the hope that “God will forgive.”
131. I relied on my own strengths and abilities, and not on the help and mercy of God.
132. She worked on holidays and weekends, and from working on these days she did not give money to the poor.
133. I visited a healer, went to a fortune teller, was treated with “biocurrents”, sat in psychic sessions.
134. She sowed enmity and discord between people, she herself offended others.
135. She sold vodka and moonshine, speculated, made moonshine (was present at the same time) and took part.
136. She suffered from gluttony, even getting up to eat and drink at night.
137. Drew a cross on the ground.
138. I read atheistic books, magazines, “treatises on love”, looked at pornographic paintings, maps, half-nude images.
139. Distorted the Holy Scripture (mistakes when reading, singing).
140. She exalted herself with pride, sought primacy and supremacy.
141. In anger she mentioned evil spirits and called on a demon.
142. I danced and played on holidays and Sundays.
143. She entered the temple in uncleanness, ate prosphora, antidor.
144. In anger, I scolded and cursed those who offended me: so that there is no bottom, no tire, etc.
145. Spent money on entertainment (rides, carousels, all kinds of shows).
146. She was offended by her spiritual father and grumbled at him.
147. She disdained kissing icons and caring for sick and old people.
148. She teased the deaf and dumb, the weak-minded, and minors, angered animals, and paid evil for evil.
149. Tempted people, wore see-through clothes, miniskirts.
150. She swore and was baptized, saying: “I will fail in this place,” etc.
151. She retold ugly stories (sinful in essence) from the lives of her parents and neighbors.
152. Had a spirit of jealousy towards a friend, sister, brother, friend.
153. She sinned by being grumpy, self-willed, and complaining that there was no health, strength, or strength in the body.
154. I envied rich people, their beauty, their intelligence, education, wealth, and goodwill.
155. She did not keep her prayers and good deeds secret, and did not keep church secrets.
156. She justified her sins with illness, infirmity, and bodily weakness.
157. She condemned other people's sins and shortcomings, compared people, gave them characteristics, judged them.
158. She revealed the sins of others, mocked them, ridiculed people.
159. Deliberately deceived, told lies.
160. I hastily read holy books when my mind and heart did not assimilate what I read.
161. I gave up prayer because I was tired, making the excuse of weakness.
162. I rarely cried because I was living unrighteously; I forgot about humility, self-reproach, salvation and the Last Judgment.
163. In my life I have not surrendered myself to the will of God.
164. She ruined her spiritual home, mocked people, discussed the fall of others.
165. She herself was an instrument of the devil.
166. She did not always cut off her will in front of the elder.
167. I spent a lot of time on empty letters, and not on spiritual ones.
168. Didn’t have a feeling of fear of God.
169. She was angry, shook her fist, and swore.
170. I read more than I prayed.
171. I succumbed to persuasion, to the temptation to sin.
172. She commanded imperiously.
173. She slandered others, forced others to swear.
174. She turned her face away from those asking.
175. She disturbed the peace of mind of her neighbor and had a sinful mood of spirit.
176. Did good without thinking about God.
177. She was vain about her place, rank, position.
178. On the bus I did not give up my seat to the elderly or passengers with children.
179. When buying, she bargained and fell into argument.
180. I did not always accept the words of the elders and confessors with faith.
181. She looked with curiosity and asked about worldly things.
182. The flesh did not live in the shower, bath, bathhouse.
183. Traveled aimlessly, out of boredom.
184. When the visitors left, she did not try to free herself from sinfulness by prayer, but remained in it.
185. She allowed herself privileges in prayer, pleasure in worldly pleasures.
186. She pleased others to please the flesh and the enemy, and not for the benefit of the spirit and salvation.
187. I sinned with unspiritual attachment to friends.
188. I was proud of myself when doing a good deed. She didn’t humiliate herself or reproach herself.
189. She did not always feel sorry for sinful people, but scolded and reproached them.
190. She was dissatisfied with her life, scolded her and said: “When death takes me.”
191. There were times when she called me annoyingly and knocked loudly to get them to open.
192. While reading, I did not think deeply about the Holy Scriptures.
193. I did not always have cordiality towards visitors and the memory of God.
194. I did things out of passion and worked needlessly.
195. Often fueled by empty dreams.
196. She sinned with malice, did not remain silent in anger, did not move away from the one who aroused anger.
197. When I was sick, I often used food not for satisfaction, but for pleasure and enjoyment.
198. She coldly received mentally helpful visitors.
199. I grieved for the one who offended me. And they grieved at me when I offended.
200. During prayer I did not always have repentant feelings or humble thoughts.
201. Insulted her husband, who avoided intimacy on the wrong day.
202. In anger, she encroached on the life of her neighbor.
203. I have sinned and am sinning by fornication: I was with my husband not to conceive children, but out of lust. In the absence of her husband, she desecrated herself with masturbation.
204. At work I experienced persecution for the truth and grieved about it.
205. Laughed at the mistakes of others and made comments out loud.
206. She wore women's whims: beautiful umbrellas, fluffy clothes, other people's hair (wigs, hairpieces, braids).
207. She was afraid of suffering and endured it reluctantly.
208. She often opened her mouth to show off her gold teeth, wore glasses with gold frames, and an abundance of rings and gold jewelry.
209. I asked advice from people who do not have spiritual intelligence.
210. Before reading the word of God, she did not always call on the grace of the Holy Spirit, she only cared about reading as much as possible.
211. She conveyed the gift of God to the womb, voluptuousness, idleness and sleep. She didn’t work, having talent.
212. I was lazy to write and rewrite spiritual instructions.
213. I dyed my hair and looked younger, visited beauty salons.
214. When giving alms, she did not combine it with the correction of her heart.
215. She did not shy away from flatterers and did not stop them.
216. She had an addiction to clothes: she cared about how not to get dirty, not dusty, not to get wet.
217. She did not always wish salvation for her enemies and did not care about it.
218. At prayer I was “a slave of necessity and duty.”
219. After fasting, I ate light meals, eating until my stomach became heavy and often without time.
220. I rarely prayed the night prayer. She sniffed tobacco and indulged in smoking.
221. Didn’t avoid spiritual temptations. Had some bad dates. I lost heart.
222. On the road I forgot about prayer.
223. Intervened with instructions.
224. She did not sympathize with the sick and mourning.
225. She didn’t always lend money.
226. I feared sorcerers more than God.
227. I felt sorry for myself for the benefit of others.
228. She soiled and spoiled sacred books.
229. I talked before morning and after evening prayer.
230. She brought glasses to guests against their will, treated them beyond measure.
231. I did the works of God without love and zeal.
232. Often I did not see my sins, I rarely condemned myself.
233. I played with my face, looking in the mirror, making grimaces.
234. She spoke about God without humility and caution.
235. I was burdened by the service, waiting for the end, hurrying quickly to the exit in order to calm down and take care of everyday affairs.
236. I rarely did self-tests; in the evening I did not read the prayer “I confess to you...”
237. I rarely thought about what I heard in the temple and read in the Scriptures.
238. I did not look for traits of kindness in an evil person and did not talk about his good deeds.
239. I often did not see my sins and rarely condemned myself.
240. Took contraceptives. She demanded protection from her husband and interruption of the act.
241. Praying for health and peace, I often went through names without the participation and love of my heart.
242. She spoke out everything when it would have been better to remain silent.
243. In the conversation I used artistic techniques. She spoke in an unnatural voice.
244. She was offended by inattention and neglect of herself, and was inattentive to others.
245. Did not abstain from excesses and pleasures.
246. She wore other people’s clothes without permission and damaged other people’s things. In the room I blew my nose on the floor.
247. She sought benefit and benefit for herself, and not for her neighbor.
248. Forced a person to sin: to lie, steal, spy.
249. Convey and retell.
250. I found pleasure in sinful dates.
251. Visited places of wickedness, debauchery and godlessness.
252. She offered her ear to hear the bad.
253. Attributed success to herself, and not to God’s help.
254. While studying spiritual life, I did not put it into practice.
255. She worried people in vain and did not calm the angry and saddened.
256. I often washed clothes, wasting time unnecessarily.
257. Sometimes she ran into danger: she crossed the road in front of vehicles, crossed a river on thin ice, etc.
258. She rose above others, showing her superiority and wisdom of mind. She allowed herself to humiliate another, mocking the shortcomings of soul and body.
259. I put off the works of God, mercy and prayer for later.
260. I didn’t mourn myself when I did a bad deed. I listened with pleasure to slanderous speeches, blasphemed the life and treatment of others.
261. Did not use excess income for spiritual benefits.
262. I did not save from the days of fasting to give to the sick, the needy and children.
263. She worked reluctantly, with grumbling and annoyance because of the low pay.
264. Was the cause of sin in family discord.
265. She endured sorrows without gratitude and self-reproach.
266. I didn’t always retire to be alone with God.
267. She lay and luxuriated in bed for a long time, and did not immediately get up to pray.
268. Lost self-control when defending the offended, kept hostility and evil in her heart.
269. Didn’t stop the speaker from gossiping. She herself often passed it on to others and with an addition from herself.
270. Before morning prayer and during the prayer rule, I did household chores.
271. She autocratically presented her thoughts as the true rule of life.
272. Ate stolen food.
273. I did not confess the Lord with my mind, heart, word, or deed. She had an alliance with the wicked.
274. At meals I was too lazy to treat and serve my neighbor.
275. She was sad about the deceased, about the fact that she herself was sick.
276. I was glad that the holiday had come and I didn’t have to work.
277. I drank wine on holidays. She loved going to dinner parties. I got fed up there.
278. I listened to the teachers when they said things that were harmful to the soul, against God.
279. Used perfume, burned Indian incense.
280. She was engaged in lesbianism and touched someone else’s body with voluptuousness. With lust and voluptuousness I watched the matings of animals.
281. She cared beyond measure about the nutrition of the body. Accepted gifts or alms at a time when there was no need to accept it.
282. I didn’t try to stay away from a person who likes to chat.
283. Didn’t get baptized, didn’t say a prayer when the church bell rang.
284. Being under the guidance of her spiritual father, she did everything according to her own will.
285. She was naked when swimming, sunbathing, doing physical education, and when she was sick she was shown to a male doctor.
286. She did not always remember and count her violations of the Law of God with repentance.
287. While reading prayers and canons, I was too lazy to bow.
288. Having heard that the person was sick, she did not rush to help.
289. In thought and word she exalted herself in the good she had done.
290. Believed the slander. She did not punish herself for her sins.
291. During church services, I read my household rule or wrote a memorial.
292. I did not abstain from my favorite foods (albeit lean ones).
293. She punished and lectured children unfairly.
294. I did not have daily memory of God’s Judgment, death, or the Kingdom of God.
295. During times of sadness, I did not occupy my mind and heart with the prayer of Christ.
296. I did not force myself to pray, to read the Word of God, or to cry about my sins.
297. She rarely commemorated the dead and did not pray for the dead.
298. She approached the Chalice with unconfessed sin.
299. In the morning I did gymnastics, and did not devote my first thoughts to God.
300. When praying, I was too lazy to cross myself, sorted out my bad thoughts, and didn’t think about what awaited me beyond the grave.
301. I hurried through prayer, shortened it out of laziness and read it without due attention.
302. I told my neighbors and acquaintances about my grievances. I visited places where bad examples were set.
303. She admonished a person without meekness and love. She became irritated when correcting her neighbor.
304. I didn’t always light the lamp on holidays and Sundays.
305. On Sundays I didn’t go to church, but to pick mushrooms and berries...
306. Had more savings than necessary.
307. I spared my strength and health in order to serve my neighbor.
308. She reproached her neighbor for what happened.
309. Walking on the way to the temple, I did not always read prayers.
310. Assented when condemning a person.
311. She was jealous of her husband, remembered her rival with anger, wished for her death, and used a witch doctor’s incantation to harass her.
312. I have been demanding and disrespectful towards people. She gained the upper hand in conversations with her neighbors. On the way to the temple, she overtook those older than me, and did not wait for those who lagged behind me.
313. She turned her abilities to earthly goods.
314. Had jealousy towards my spiritual father.
315. I always tried to be right.
316. I asked unnecessary questions.
317. Cried about the temporary.
318. Interpreted dreams and took them seriously.
319. She boasted about her sin, the evil she had done.
320. After communion I did not guard against sin.
321. I kept atheist books and playing cards in the house.
322. She gave advice without knowing whether it was pleasing to God; she was careless in the affairs of God.
323. She accepted prosphora and holy water without reverence (she spilled holy water, spilled crumbs of prosphora).
324. I went to bed and got up without prayer.
325. She spoiled her children, not paying attention to their bad deeds.
326. During Lent, she practiced guttural diarrhea and loved to drink strong tea, coffee, and other drinks.
327. I took tickets and groceries from the back door, and rode on a bus without a ticket.
328. She put prayer and the temple above serving her neighbor.
329. Endured sorrows with despondency and murmuring.
330. I was irritated when tired and sick.
331. Had free relations with persons of the other sex.
332. When thinking about worldly affairs, she gave up prayer.
333. I was forced to eat and drink the sick and children.
334. She treated vicious people with contempt and did not strive to convert them.
335. She knew and gave money for an evil deed.
336. She entered the house without an invitation, spied through a crack, through a window, through a keyhole, and listened at the door.
337. Confided secrets to strangers.
338. I ate food without need and hunger.
339. I read prayers with errors, got confused, missed them, put the emphasis incorrectly.
340. She lived lustfully with her husband. She allowed perversion and carnal pleasures.
341. She lent money and asked for debts back.
342. I tried to find out more about divine objects than was revealed by God.
343. She sinned with body movement, gait, gesture.
344. She set herself up as an example, boasted, boasted.
345. She spoke passionately about earthly things and delighted in the memory of sin.
346. I went to the temple and back with empty conversations.
347. I insured my life and property, I wanted to make money from the insurance.
348. She was greedy for pleasure, unchaste.
349. She conveyed her conversations with the elder and her temptations to others.
350. She was a donor not out of love for her neighbor, but for the sake of drinking, free days, for money.
351. Boldly and willfully plunged herself into sorrows and temptations.
352. I was bored and dreamed of travel and entertainment.
353. Made wrong decisions in anger.
354. I was distracted by thoughts while praying.
355. Traveled south for carnal pleasures.
356. I used the time of prayer for everyday matters.
357. She distorted words, distorted the thoughts of others, and expressed her displeasure out loud.
358. I was ashamed to admit to my neighbors that I am a believer and visit the temple of God.
359. She slandered, demanded justice in higher authorities, wrote complaints.
360. She denounced those who do not visit the temple and do not repent.
361. I bought lottery tickets with the hope of getting rich.
362. She gave alms and rudely slandered the beggar.
363. I listened to the advice of egoists who themselves were slaves of the womb and their carnal passions.
364. I was engaged in self-aggrandizement, proudly expecting a greeting from my neighbor.
365. I was burdened by fasting and looked forward to its end.
366. She could not bear the stench of people without disgust.
367. In anger she denounced people, forgetting that we are all sinners.
368. She went to bed, did not remember the affairs of the day and did not shed tears about her sins.
369. She did not keep the Charter of the Church and the traditions of the Holy Fathers.
370. She paid for help in the household with vodka and tempted people with drunkenness.
371. During fasting, I made tricks in food.
372. I was distracted from prayer when bitten by a mosquito, fly or other insect.
373. At the sight of human ingratitude, I refrained from doing good deeds.
374. She shunned dirty work: cleaning the toilet, picking up trash.
375. During the period of breastfeeding, she did not abstain from married life.
376. In the temple she stood with her back to the altar and the holy icons.
377. She prepared sophisticated dishes and tempted her with guttural rage.
378. I read entertaining books with pleasure, and not the Scriptures of the Holy Fathers.
379. I watched TV, spent all day at the “box”, and not in prayers in front of icons.
380. Listened to passionate worldly music.
381. She sought consolation in friendship, yearned for carnal pleasures, loved to kiss men and women on the mouth.
382. Engaged in extortion and deception, judged and discussed people.
383. While fasting, I felt disgusted by monotonous, lean food.
384. She spoke the Word of God to unworthy people (not “throwing pearls before swine”).
385. She neglected the holy icons and did not wipe them from dust in a timely manner.
386. I was too lazy to write congratulations on church holidays.
387. Spent time in worldly games and entertainment: checkers, backgammon, lotto, cards, chess, rolling pins, ruffles, Rubik's cube and others.
388. She charmed illnesses, gave advice to go to sorcerers, gave addresses of sorcerers.
389. She believed omens and slander: she spat over her left shoulder, a black cat ran by, a spoon, fork, etc. fell.
390. She answered the angry man sharply to his anger.
391. Tried to prove the justification and justice of her anger.
392. She was annoying, interrupted people’s sleep, and distracted them from their meals.
393. Relaxed with small talk with young people of the opposite sex.
394. Was engaged in idle talk, curiosity, stuck around fires and was present at accidents.
395. She considered it unnecessary to undergo treatment for illnesses and visit a doctor.
396. I tried to calm myself down by hastily fulfilling the rule.
397. I overworked myself with work.
398. I ate a lot during the meat-eating week.
399. Gave incorrect advice to neighbors.
400. She told shameful jokes.
401. To please the authorities, she covered the holy icons.
402. I neglected a person in his old age and his poverty of mind.
403. She stretched out her hands to her naked body, looked and touched the secret ouds with her hands.
404. She punished children with anger, in a fit of passion, with abuse and cursing.
405. Taught children to spy, eavesdrop, pimp.
406. She spoiled her children and did not pay attention to their bad deeds.
407. I had a satanic fear for my body, I was afraid of wrinkles and gray hair.
408. Burdened others with requests.
409. Drew conclusions about the sinfulness of people based on their misfortunes.
410. Wrote offensive and anonymous letters, spoke rudely, disturbed people on the phone, making jokes under an assumed name.
411. Sat on the bed without the owner’s permission.
412. During prayer I imagined the Lord.
413. Satanic laughter attacked while reading and listening to the Divine.
414. I asked advice from people ignorant in this matter, I believed in crafty people.
415. I strived for championship, competition, won interviews, participated in competitions.
416. Treated the Gospel as a fortune-telling book.
417. I picked berries, flowers, branches in other people's gardens without permission.
418. During fasting, she did not have a good disposition towards people and allowed violations of fasting.
419. I did not always realize and regret the sin.
420. I listened to worldly records, sinned by watching videos and porn movies, and relaxed in other worldly pleasures.
421. I read a prayer, having enmity against my neighbor.
422. She prayed in a hat, with her head uncovered.
423. I believed in omens.
424. She indiscriminately used papers on which the name of God was written.
425. She was proud of her literacy and erudition, imagined, singled out people with higher education.
426. She appropriated the money she found.
427. In church I put bags and things on the windows.
428. I rode for pleasure in a car, motor boat, or bicycle.
429. I repeated other people’s bad words, listened to people swearing.
430. I read newspapers, books, and worldly magazines with enthusiasm.
431. She abhorred the poor, the wretched, the sick, who smelled bad.
432. She was proud that she had not committed shameful sins, capital murder, abortion, etc.
433. I ate and got drunk before the onset of the fasts.
434. I purchased unnecessary things without having to.
435. After a prodigal sleep, I did not always read prayers against defilement.
436. She celebrated the New Year, wore masks and obscene clothes, got drunk, cursed, overeated and sinned.
437. Caused damage to her neighbor, spoiled and broke other people's things.
438. She believed in nameless “prophets”, in “holy letters”, “the dream of the Virgin Mary”, she herself copied them and passed them on to others.
439. I listened to sermons in church with a spirit of criticism and condemnation.
440. She used her earnings for sinful lusts and amusements.
441. Spread bad rumors about priests and monks.
442. She jostled around in the church, hurrying to kiss the icon, the Gospel, the cross.
443. She was proud, in her lack and poverty she was indignant and grumbled at the Lord.
444. I urinated in public and even joked about it.
445. She did not always repay what she borrowed on time.
446. She minimized her sins in confession.
447. Gloated at the misfortune of her neighbor.
448. She taught others in an instructive, commanding tone.
449. She shared their vices with people and confirmed them in these vices.
450. Quarreled with people for a place in the church, at the icons, near the eve table.
451. Inadvertently caused pain to animals.
452. I left a glass of vodka at the grave of relatives.
453. I did not sufficiently prepare myself for the sacrament of confession.
454. The sanctity of Sundays and holidays was violated by games, visits to shows, etc.
455. When the crops were being grassed, she swore at the cattle with dirty words.
456. I had dates in cemeteries; as a child we ran and played hide and seek there.
457. Allowed sexual intercourse before marriage.
458. She got drunk on purpose in order to decide to sin; she took medicine along with wine to get more drunk.
459. She begged for alcohol, pawned things and documents for this.
460. To attract attention to herself, to make her worry, she tried to commit suicide.
461. As a child, I didn’t listen to teachers, prepared my lessons poorly, was lazy, and disrupted classes.
462. I visited cafes and restaurants located in churches.
463. She sang in a restaurant, on the stage, and danced in a variety show.
464. In crowded transport, I felt pleasure from touching and did not try to avoid it.
465. She was offended by her parents for punishment, remembered these grievances for a long time and told others about them.
466. She reassured herself with the fact that everyday worries prevented her from engaging in matters of faith, salvation and piety, and justified herself with the fact that in her youth no one taught the Christian faith.
467. Wasted time on useless chores, fuss, and conversations.
468. Was engaged in the interpretation of dreams.
469. She objected with passion, fought, and scolded.
470. She sinned with thefts, as a child she stole eggs, gave them to a store, etc.
471. She was vain, proud, did not respect her parents, and did not obey the authorities.
472. She engaged in heresy, had a wrong opinion about the subject of faith, doubt and even apostasy from the Orthodox faith.
473. Had the sin of Sodom (coitus with animals, with the wicked, entered into an incestuous relationship).
It is necessary to remember that the procedure of confession and repentance should enter your spiritual life and be frequent. It is recommended to go to the sacrament at least once every six months. How often this will be is up to you to decide, but remember that after such cleansing your soul will feel much lighter and you will be freed from the burden that weighs you down.
The Lord is always with you!
Watch the video on how to confess correctly:
Confession is considered a Christian rite in which the person confessing repents and repents of his sins in the hope of forgiveness by God Christ. The Savior himself established this sacrament and told the disciples the words that are written in the Gospel of Matthew, ch. 18, verse 18. This is also spoken of in the Gospel of John, ch. 20, verses 22 – 23.
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Sacrament of Confession
According to the holy fathers, repentance is also considered a second baptism. Man during baptism cleansed from sin the firstborn, who was passed on to everyone from the first ancestors Adam and Eve. And after the rite of baptism, during repentance, personal thoughts are washed away. When a person performs the sacrament of repentance, he must be honest and aware of his sins, sincerely repenting of them, and not repeat the sin, believing in the hope of salvation by Jesus Christ and His mercy. The priest reads a prayer and cleansing from sins occurs.
Many who do not want to repent of their sins often say that they have no sins: “I didn’t kill, I didn’t steal, I didn’t commit adultery, so I have nothing to repent of?” This is stated in the first Epistle of John in the first chapter, verse 17 - “If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.” This means that sinful events happen every day if you understand the essence of God's commandments. There are three categories of sin: sin against the Lord God, sin against loved ones and sin against oneself.
List of sins against Jesus Christ
List of sins against loved ones
List of sins against yourself
All listed sins are divided into three categories, in the final analysis, all this is against the Lord God. After all, a violation of the commandments He created is carried out, therefore, a direct insult to God occurs. All these sins do not produce positive fruits, but on the contrary, the soul will not be saved from this.
Proper preparation for confession
It is necessary to prepare for the sacrament of confession with all seriousness; for this purpose, one should engage in early preparation. Enough remember and write down on a piece of paper all the sins you have committed, and also read detailed information about the sacrament of confession. You should take a piece of paper for the ceremony and read everything again before the process. The same sheet can be given to the confessor, but grave sins must be spoken out loud. It is enough to talk about the sin itself, and not list long stories, for example, if there is enmity in the family, and with neighbors, one should repent of the main sin - condemnation of neighbors and loved ones.
In this ritual, the confessor and God are not interested in numerous sins, the meaning itself is important - sincere repentance for sins committed, a sincere feeling of a person, a contrite heart. Confession is not just awareness of one’s sinful past deeds, but also desire to wash them away. Justifying oneself for sins is not cleansing, it is unacceptable. Elder Silouan of Athos said that if a person hates sin, then God also asks for these sins.
It will be great if a person draws conclusions from each passing day, and each time truly repents of his sins, writing them down on paper, and for serious sins it is necessary to confess to a confessor in the church. You should immediately ask for forgiveness from people who have been offended by word or deed. There is a rule in the Orthodox prayer book - the Penitential Canon, which must be read intensively in the evenings before the sacrament of confession itself.
It is important to find out the church schedule and what day you can go to confession. There are many churches in which daily services are held, and the daily sacrament of confession also takes place there. And in the rest you should find out about the schedule of church services.
How to Confess to Children
Children under seven years of age are considered infants and can receive communion without prior confession. But it is important to accustom them from childhood to a sense of reverence. Without the necessary preparation, frequent communion causes reluctance to engage in this matter. Preferably prepare children for the sacrament in a few days, an example is reading the Holy Scriptures and children's Orthodox literature. Reduce TV viewing time. Observe the morning and evening prayers. If a child has done bad things over the past few days, then you should talk to him and instill in him a feeling of shame for what he has done. But you always need to know: the child follows the example of his parents.
After the age of seven, you can begin confession on the same basis as adults, but without the preliminary sacrament. The sins listed above are committed in large numbers by children, so children's communion has its own nuances.
To help children sincerely confess, it is necessary to give a list of sins:
This is a superficial list of possible sins. There are many personal sins for each child based on their thoughts and actions. An important goal of parents is to prepare the child for repentance. Need a child he wrote down all his sins without the participation of his parents- you shouldn’t write him down. He must understand that it is necessary to sincerely admit and repent of bad deeds.
How to confess in church
Confession falls on morning and evening time days. It is considered unacceptable to be late for such an event. A group of repentants begins the process by reading the rites. When the priest begins to ask the names of the participants who came to confession, you need to answer neither loudly nor quietly. Latecomers are not accepted for confession. At the end of confession, the priest reads the rite again, receiving the sacrament. Women during natural monthly cleansing are not allowed to participate in such an event.
You need to behave with dignity in church and not disturb other confessors and the priest. It is not allowed to embarrass the people who came to this event. There is no need to confess one category of sins and leave another later. Those sins that were named last time are not re-read. It is advisable to perform the sacrament from the same confessor. In the sacrament, a person repents not before his confessor, but before the Lord God.
In large churches many penitents gather and in this case it is used "general confession". The point is that the priest pronounces common sins, and those confessing repent. Next, everyone must come to the prayer of permission. When confession takes place for the first time, you should not come to such a general procedure.
First time visit private confession, if there is none, then at general confession you need to take the last place in line and listen to what they say to the priest during confession. It is advisable to explain the whole situation to the priest; he will tell you how to confess for the first time. Next comes true repentance. If during the process of repentance a person kept silent about a serious sin, then he will not be forgiven. At the end of the sacrament, a person is obliged, after reading the prayer of permission, to kiss the Gospel and the cross, which lie on the lectern.
Proper preparation for communion
On the days of fasting, which last seven days, fasting is established. The diet should not include fish, dairy, meat and egg products. On such days, sexual intercourse should not be performed. It is necessary to attend church frequently. Read the Penitential Canon and follow the prayer rules. On the eve of the sacrament, you must arrive for the service in the evening. Before going to bed, you should read the canons of the Archangel Michael, our Lord Jesus Christ and the Mother of God. If this is not possible, such prayer rules can be shifted by several days during the fast.
Children have a hard time remembering and perceiving prayer rules, so you should choose the number that is within your power, but you need to discuss this with your confessor. To prepare gradually you need 
increase the number of prayer rules. Most people confuse the rules of confession and communion. Here you need to prepare step by step. To do this, you should ask for advice from a priest, who will advise you on more precise preparation.
Sacrament of Communion carried out on an empty stomach, you should not consume food and water after 12 o’clock, and you should also not smoke. This does not apply to children under seven years of age. But they need to be accustomed to this a year before the adult sacrament. Morning prayers should also be read for Holy Communion. During morning confession, you must arrive at the right time without being late.
Participle
The Lord God established the sacrament during the hours of the Last Supper, when Christ broke bread with his disciples and drank wine with them. Participle helps you enter the Kingdom of Heaven, therefore incomprehensible to the human mind. Women are not allowed to attend communion wearing makeup, and on ordinary Sundays they should wipe off anything from their lips. On menstrual days, women are not allowed to participate in the Sacrament., as well as those who have recently given birth, for the latter you need to read the prayer for the fortieth day.
When the priest comes out with the Holy Gifts, participants are required to bow. Next, you need to listen carefully to the prayers, repeating to yourself. Then you should cross your arms across your chest and approach the bowl. Children should go first, then men, and then women. Near the cup one’s name is pronounced and thereby the communicant receives the Gifts of the Lord. After communion, the deacon treats his lips with a plate, then you need to kiss the edge of the cup and approach the table. Here the person takes a drink and consumes the prosphora part.
At the end, participants listen to prayers and pray until the end of the service. Then you should go to the cross and listen carefully to the prayer of thanks. At the end, everyone goes home, but in church you cannot speak empty words and disturb each other. On this day you need to behave with dignity and not defile your purity with sinful deeds.
How should you prepare for your first confession? Ksenia
Dear Ksenia! The most important thing is not to change your mind and not to put off for later what your soul asks for and what your soul strives for. External preparation can be different, and you will subsequently determine its extent together with the priest who will one day become your spiritual mentor; don’t even think about it now. And try to carefully remember your life from adolescence, from the time when you began to distinguish between white and black, bad and good - and everything that your conscience reproaches you with, all those pages that you want to turn over as quickly as possible, everything that the evil one will talk about whispering: “But don’t say this, it’s too long ago, it’s too embarrassing, it’s too impossible to pronounce and explain,” this is exactly what you bring to confession along with the determination never to return to some sins, but with others, rather, skills, passions, sinful habits of waging an uncompromising struggle.
Another practical piece of advice is to try to find out in advance about the church where you are going to go to confession, when there is an opportunity to confess in detail. It’s even better to agree with the priest in advance, warning him that this will be your first time at confession. Priest Maxim Kozlov
How should you prepare for confession? On what principle should a confession be drawn up - according to the commandments, or according to the chronology of the sins I have committed? How much should one say? Is it enough to simply admit that you have sinned? Olga
Dear Olga. You need to come to church for confession, following the advice the priest has already given you. You can record confession in advance, starting at the age of 7. Repeated sins can be simply named, or the situations that led to the sin can be described. Sometimes a person painfully feels that under some circumstances his soul was severely crippled by sin, and wounds remained on his heart, the touch of which causes acute pain or pain dulled by time.
Then it really takes courage to reveal to the priest what is sometimes painful and embarrassing to talk about. But if not revealed, then hidden sin will continue to destroy the soul and heart from the inside. It happens that some sins cannot be remembered, and some actions or thoughts may not have seemed a sin, then regular further confessions and fervent prayer will lead them out of the darkness of oblivion.
You must come to confession, especially the first one, when the priest has enough time to talk with you, i.e. at the evening service. Having accepted your confession, the priest will decide whether you are ready to receive communion, or whether you need to fast, pray, or go to church. But you can resolve all this with him directly in conversation. As for tears during confession, they are natural for a penitent. May the Lord and your Guardian Angel help you overcome all obstacles that hinder the purification of your soul. God help, priest Alexander Ilyashenko
Can I confess through correspondence without going to church? Tatiana.
Hello Tatyana, confession is a sacrament performed by the Lord Himself, and the priest is a witness that repentance has taken place. A repentant person overcomes the most terrible and constant enemy - himself. He wins a major victory over himself and the priest testifies that it really happened. We repent in order to change internally, to correct ourselves with the help of God. Lord help you to find a confessor to whom your soul would be inclined, priest Alexander Ilyashenko
I confessed via email, is that correct? Irina.
Hello Irina. In my opinion, confession over the Internet is unacceptable. Of course, confessing sins can be both bitter and shameful. Confession is a sacrament in which the priest is a witness of your repentance for sin. Repentance separates sin from a person; it is a grace-filled change in the state of the soul.
Why is it bad when a priest witnesses how a shameful sin is separated from a repentant person? If a person truly repents, then the priest will rejoice for him and thank God. And if there is no repentance, then it is not easy to open up in confession. Repentance is a gift from God; one must ask the Lord for it. There have been cases in history when a person was unable, due to circumstances, to confess to a priest. But these were extreme situations. For example, a person dies far from the church and conveys his last confession to a friend, so that when the opportunity arises, he will retell it to the priest. There was a case described by Bishop Veniamin (Fedchenkov), when Governor General Bünting, who was in mortal danger, had the opportunity to confess for the last time in his life by telephone. But you need to overcome your embarrassment. Repentance exists for this purpose, to bring to light that which hinders the union of the soul with God. God help you! Priest Alexander Ilyashenko
The closer to confession, the stronger the “twist”. Such thoughts creep into my head, it seems, out of shame and I'm afraid I'll die... What should I do, what prayer should I read in order to survive? I thank you from the bottom of my heart in advance! Marina.
Hello, Marina.
You can pray in your own words that the Lord will help you resist all these thoughts. But you still need to come to confession in any case and in any condition. God help you, priest Mikhail Nemnonov.
I went to confession many times and did not feel any relief. I often come across people who say that after confession they feel such joy and lightness. If you don’t feel relief, joy and lightness, does this mean that your sins are still forgiven? Irina
Dear Irina!
Saint Theophan the Recluse says that to whom joy is useful, joy is given, and to whom sadness is useful, sadness is given, as long as this sadness is according to God. This means that our repentance must become more serious and the testing of our relationships with other people more severe.
The Monk Macarius the Great testifies that he knew many who at the beginning of the path were extremely blessed, but then fell in the most pitiful way. And there are even more of those who worked all their lives in humble obedience to faith, without any special consolations, and achieved salvation in eternal Easter. With sincere repentance of sins, a person receives forgiveness from the Lord in the sacrament of confession, even if after confession there is no feeling of any special joy.
Sincerely, priest Alexander Ilyashenko
During confession, I forgot a lot out of excitement. Does this mean that my confession is invalid, and I don’t forgiven? When I prepare for confession, I always write down my sins on paper. And still, out of excitement, I’ll forget something. After the last confession there was no feeling of lightness, there was a feeling of annoyance. Julia
Dear Yulia! Forgotten sins are not scary, they are forgiven. Try to write down your sins further, and those sins that you forgot to say, you will say at confession next time.
God help you, priest Alexander Ilyashenko
How often should a person go to confession to a priest? Svetlana.
Hello Svetlana! It is better for you to discuss the regularity of confession and communion with your confessor. In my opinion, the best option is once every two to three weeks, plus major church holidays. Priest Alexander Ilyashenko
In confession she said about the sin of her youth: “I sinned by fornication.” Is this confession enough, or do we still need to say something more specifically? Irina.
Dear Irina! Yes, indeed, during confession there is no need to describe sins in detail, so you confessed correctly, I don’t see your mistake. But fornication is one of the grave sins, so confession alone is not enough. It is necessary to constantly and fervently repent before the Lord about the sin you once committed and pray to him for forgiveness, to monitor the state of your soul. Confess regularly about your sins, even everyday ones. Trust in God's mercy, God help you.
Priest Alexander Ilyashenko
I want to confess and I don’t know if this is considered a sin? When I was 8-9 years old, and my brother was 7-8 years old, we watched a bad film and, out of our stupidity, began to repeat what we saw. My conscience is very tormenting me. N.
Dear N.!
Temporary shame in this transitory life means nothing in comparison with the glory that awaits those who have resorted to Holy Repentance! Confess it as simply as you asked now - no names are needed here: just tell everything to the priest sincerely, praying to the Lord for forgiveness, and God's mercy will be with you! Remember: there is no sin that cannot be cleansed by repentance! Remember the joy that happens in Heaven about repentant sinners - repent and this joy will touch your heart too!
Strength to you and fidelity to the Lord! Priest Alexy Kolosov
Do I need to confess the sin of fornication more honestly again? I confessed it several times, but without details, sparing the priest’s ears. Elena
Dear Elena!
A sin once confessed does not need to be confessed again unless you commit it again. When confessing prodigal sins, it is usually not recommended to describe in detail what was committed, so if you did not name some details, then this is not a “non-disclosure,” much less a “concealment.” I advise you not to confess your confessed sins a second or third time, but if your thoughts confuse you, then you need to pray and repent before the Lord and ask Him for forgiveness. From you - sincerity and constancy, and the result - from the Lord.
I have problems with confession and with spiritual life...I once went to church regularly. I read that you need to hate this world, but I don’t want to hate it. My husband is very jealous of me. I can imagine what a scandal it would be if I went to church and stayed late for confession, even if we went together, I would get another question: “What did I confess for so long? Victoria.
Dear Victoria. You need to hate the evil in the world, and not the world itself, and in this you are absolutely right. Condemnation is a sin, a violation of God’s commandment: “Judge not, lest ye be judged.” This sin is a manifestation of pride. The Apostle John the Theologian says: “There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear.” It seems to me that the shortcoming of your husband that you are talking about can be overcome with love. The more you are gentle, affectionate, friendly and delicate towards him, the sooner this drawback will pass. Try to be sincere and open with your husband. You need to go to confession, but warn your husband that you will be late so that he does not worry.
God help, priest Alexander Ilyashenko
I am tormented by doubts that I did not fully confess at the general confession! I didn’t name individual episodes, and now I won’t be able to remember what was confessed and what wasn’t. Olga
Dear Olga!
What is important for the Lord is not the meticulous listing of sins, but the depth and sincerity of the repentant feeling. The Lord is a Hearer, not an accountant. But if some sin torments your conscience, you can name it at the next confession.
Sincerely, priest Alexander Ilyashenko
I made my first confession to the priest while drunk, but it was for courage. Is this considered confession? Yuri.
Dear Yuri!
The Sacraments should be approached decorously and in purity - of course, the sacrament has been completed, but one should still repent of the fact that they were drunk during confession. And remember: drunken “bravery” is of little use! And the priest most likely noticed, but, sensing your condition and anxiety, he showed tact and understanding.
Sincerely, priest Alexy Kolosov
Father dozed off for a few moments during my confession. Is my confession considered perfect or not? Larisa
Yes, Larisa, your confession is considered perfect, because in confession you repent not to the priest, but to the Lord, the priest is only a witness of your repentance. God help you! Priest Alexander Ilyashenko
Can I repent of sin, realizing that I am not yet able to get rid of it? Thinking about this sin causes me suffering. Katerina.
Hello, Katerina!
Isn’t there hypocrisy in the fact that I constantly repent for my pride, envy, temper...? I think you understand that such sins are not immediately and irrevocably eradicated at once. So why not repent?
Look how often we wash our bodies, even if we are not particularly dirty. And we know, we realize that we need to wash constantly and throughout our lives. Maybe not wash it then?
So, Katerina, go to confession and repent of what weighs on your conscience. Remember, as St. John Chrysostom said, that the Lord not only accepts fruits, but also kisses intentions. Pray with warmth from your heart: Lord, You see how this sin oppresses me, how I suffer from it! Help, give me the strength to get rid of him! And so on, as the confessor advises. Ask him for prayers and advice on how to deal with your situation.
God help you! Priest Pavel Ilyinsky.
Is there any point in the following confession if you have not gotten rid of the sin because of which you were not allowed to take communion? Rita
Rita, hello!
There is always a point in confession, except in those cases when we do not want to get rid of the sin we are confessing. But if you still want to part with this sin, but have not yet been able to do so, then you need to confess.
Sincerely, priest Mikhail Nemnonov
I want to confess, I am embarrassed that a priest can have a negative attitude towards such sins as: blasphemy against the Church and clergy, doubting the power and ridiculing God, listening to songs with satanic content. Eugene
Hello, Evgeniy!
Do not be afraid that the priest will treat you negatively. It is he, more than anyone else, who knows well how weak a person is, how often he is capable of making mistakes. Realizing both his shortcomings and the fact that there are no sinless people, any priest always welcomes with great joy if a person has gained faith and has taken the path of salvation.
Therefore, there is no need to fear either condemnation, contempt, or, especially, anger. Tell him in confession simply and artlessly, everything that is in your soul and that now you intend to live according to the Commandments, and for this you ask for his prayers and instructions.
Father will give you advice for spiritual life and bless you in the name of Christ.
God help you! Priest Pavel Ilinsky
I recently confessed to the sin of fornication. I entered into an extramarital relationship with a guy whom I love and with whom we are going to legalize our relationship in the future. Previously, I didn’t understand what was sinful about an extramarital affair, and therefore I didn’t go to confession, I just didn’t want to repent of what I didn’t understand, just because the Church said so. After all, after confession one must not return to sin. It's hard when you don't understand the meaning. I was waiting and thinking. Then an understanding of everything came, and it was as if an abyss had opened up before my feet. Although I repented in confession, my soul is heavy and gloomy. Everything hurts inside.
It used to be that after confession you left the church, and the world around you seemed to become brighter and more joyful, and everything inside was singing. And now I was leaving the temple as if I were leaving an operating room - with the same heavy feeling of pain and loss. Depression has not let me go since then; I cannot cope with it on my own. What should I do, it seems to me that God does not love me as before - after all, I am no longer so pure. How does repentance for fornication occur, since it is considered a mortal sin? I know that many saints were tormented for years for such a sin. Is this how it should be? How much do I need to suffer in order to regain my previous spiritual state that was before my fall?
Kate
Dear Catherine, firstly, it is very good that the Lord gave you the courage to repent of your grave mortal sin before the cross and the Gospel in the sacrament of confession, to recognize it as a sin, and not just as a norm of everyday behavior, which is characteristic of so many people today. You ask why there is no relief in your soul, why it didn’t immediately become light and clear. But Katya, sin differs from sin, sometimes a person stumbles, does some dirty trick, repents of it - and that’s it, just like he washed his face with water, that’s all there is to it. And it happens, as with a serious illness: a person undergoes an operation, they cut out his appendix, or some malignant tumors - oh, how long the whole body still hurts. So it is with sins. When we decide to cut out something malignant, painful, which greatly distorts us, then after the operation it will take a long time to come to our senses. The same patient - he feels sick, and he doesn’t want to live, and for the first week it seems that he will die now, but still the oncology is no longer there, what poisoned him and deprived him of the opportunity to live in the future is no longer there. So with such a sin - at first it will be hard, and then further, by correcting your life and not returning to this sin, you will testify to God that your repentance was real, and in this effort of life the Lord will gradually give you peace, joy and further straightness of your path to salvation.
priest Maxim Kozlov
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Once in our lives we receive Baptism and are anointed with Chrism. Ideally, we get married once. The Sacrament of the Priesthood is not all-encompassing; it is performed only on those whom the Lord has destined to be accepted into the clergy. In the Sacrament of Unction our participation is very small. But the Sacraments of Confession and Communion lead us through our entire lives to eternity, without them the existence of a Christian is unthinkable. We get to them time after time. So sooner or later we still have the opportunity to think: are we preparing for them correctly? And understand: no, most likely not entirely. Therefore, talking about these Sacraments seems very important to us. In this issue, in a conversation with the editor-in-chief of the magazine, Abbot Nektariy (Morozov), we decided to touch upon confession (because covering everything is an impossible task, too “boundless” a topic), and next time we will talk about Communion of the Holy Mysteries.
“I guess, or rather, I guess: nine out of ten who come to confession don’t know how to confess...
- Indeed, it is so. Even people who regularly go to church do not know how to do many things in it, but the worst thing is with confession. Very rarely does a parishioner confess correctly. You have to learn to confess. Of course, it would be better if an experienced confessor, a man of high spiritual life, spoke about the Sacrament of Confession and repentance. If I decide to talk about this here, it’s simply as a person who confesses, on the one hand, and on the other, as a priest who quite often has to accept confession. I will try to summarize my observations of my own soul and how others participate in the Sacrament of Repentance. But by no means do I consider my observations sufficient.
— Let's talk about the most common misconceptions, misconceptions and mistakes. A person goes to confession for the first time; he heard that before receiving communion, one must confess. And that in confession you need to tell your sins. He immediately has a question: for what period should he “report”? Over your entire life, starting from childhood? But can you retell all this? Or do you not need to retell everything, but just say: “In childhood and youth I showed selfishness many times” or “In my youth I was very proud and vain, and even now, in fact, I remain the same”?
— If a person comes to confession for the first time, it is quite obvious that he needs to confess for his entire past life. Starting from the age when he could already distinguish good from evil - and until the moment he finally decided to confess.
How can you tell your whole life in a short time? In confession, we do not tell our whole life, but what is sin. Sins are specific events. However, there is no need to recount all the times when you sinned with anger, for example, or with lies. You must say that you committed this sin, and cite some of the brightest, most terrible manifestations of this sin - those that truly hurt your soul. There is one more pointer: what do you least want to tell about yourself? This is exactly what needs to be said first. If you are going to confession for the first time, it is best for you to set yourself the task of confessing your heaviest, most painful sins. Then the confession will become more complete, deeper. The first confession cannot be like this - for several reasons: this is a psychological barrier (coming for the first time in front of a priest, that is, in front of a witness, telling God about your sins is not easy) and other obstacles. A person does not always understand what sin is. Unfortunately, not even all people living church life know and understand the Gospel well. And except in the Gospel, the answer to the question of what is sin and what is virtue, perhaps, will not be found anywhere. In the life around us, many sins have become commonplace... But even when reading the Gospel to a person, his sins are not immediately revealed, they are gradually revealed by the grace of God. St. Peter of Damascus says that the beginning of the health of the soul is seeing one’s sins as countless as the sand of the sea. If the Lord had immediately revealed to a person his sinfulness in all its horror, not a single person could have endured it. That is why the Lord reveals his sins to a person gradually. This can be compared to peeling an onion - first they removed one skin, then the second - and finally they got to the onion itself. That is why it very often happens: a person goes to church, regularly confesses, takes communion - and finally realizes the need for the so-called general confession. It very rarely happens that a person is ready for it right away.
- What it is? How does general confession differ from ordinary confession?
— General confession, as a rule, is called confession for the entire life lived, and in a certain sense this is true. But a confession that is not so comprehensive can also be called general. We repent of our sins from week to week, from month to month, this is a simple confession. But from time to time you need to give yourself a general confession - a review of your entire life. Not the one that was lived, but the one that is now. We see that we repeat the same sins, and we cannot get rid of them - that’s why we need to understand ourselves. Review your entire life as it is now.
— How to treat the so-called questionnaires for general confession? They can be seen in church shops.
— If by general confession we mean precisely confession for the entire life lived, then here there really is a need for some kind of external assistance. The best guide for confessors is the book by Archimandrite John (Krestyankin) “The Experience of Constructing a Confession”, it is about the spirit, the correct attitude of a repentant person, about what exactly needs to be repented of. There is a book “Sin and Repentance of the Last Times. About the secret ailments of the soul" by Archimandrite Lazar (Abashidze). Useful excerpts from St. Ignatius (Brianchaninov) - “To help the penitent.” As for the questionnaires - yes, there are confessors, there are priests who do not approve of these questionnaires. They say that you can read in them such sins that the reader has never even heard of, but if he reads them, he will be harmed... But, unfortunately, there are almost no sins left that modern man would not know about. Yes, there are questions there that are stupid, rude, there are questions that are clearly sinning with excessive physiology... But if you treat the questionnaire as a working tool, like a plow with which you need to plow yourself all over once, then, I think, you can use it. In the old days, such questionnaires were called “renewal,” which is so wonderful to modern ears. Indeed, with their help, man renewed himself as the image of God, just as an old, dilapidated and grimy icon is renewed. There is no need to think about whether these questionnaires are in good or bad literary form. The serious shortcomings of some questionnaires include this: the compilers include in them something that, in essence, is not a sin. Didn’t you wash your hands with scented soap, for example, or didn’t you do your laundry on Sunday... If you did the laundry during Sunday service, that’s a sin, but if you did the laundry after the service because there was no other time, I personally don’t see it as a sin.
“Unfortunately, you can sometimes buy this in our church shops...
- This is why it is necessary to consult a priest before using the questionnaire. I can recommend the book by Priest Alexy Moroz “I Confess Sin, Father” - it is a reasonable and very detailed questionnaire.
— Here it is necessary to clarify: what do we mean by the word “sin”? Most of those who confess, when they pronounce this word, mean a sinful act. That is, in essence, a manifestation of sin. For example: “Yesterday I was harsh and cruel to my mother.” But this is not a separate, not some random episode, this is a manifestation of the sin of dislike, intolerance, unforgiveness, selfishness. This means that you shouldn’t say that, not “yesterday I was cruel,” but simply “I’m cruel, there’s little love in me.” Or how should I say it?
— Sin is a manifestation of passion in action. We must repent of specific sins. Not in passions as such, because passions are always the same, you can write one confession to yourself for the rest of your life, but in those sins that were committed from confession to confession. Confession is the Sacrament that gives us the opportunity to start a new life. We repented of our sins, and from that moment our life began anew. This is the miracle that takes place in the Sacrament of Confession. That is why you always need to repent - in the past tense. You shouldn’t say: “I offend my neighbors,” I should say: “I offended my neighbors.” Because I have the intention, having said this, not to offend people in the future.Each sin in confession should be named so that it is clear what exactly it is. If we repent of idle talk, we do not need to retell all the episodes of our idle talk and repeat all our idle words. But if in some case there was so much idle talk that we tired someone with it or said something completely unnecessary, we probably need to talk about this in confession in a little more detail, more definitely. There are such words from the Gospel: For every idle word that people speak, they will give an answer on the day of judgment (Matthew 12:36). You need to look at your confession in advance from this point of view - whether there will be idle talk in it.
- And yet about passions. If I feel irritated by my neighbor’s request, but I don’t show this irritation in any way and provide him with the necessary help, should I repent of the irritation I experienced as a sin?
- If you, feeling this irritation within yourself, consciously fought against it - this is one situation. If you accepted this irritation of yours, developed it in yourself, reveled in it - this is a different situation. Everything depends on the direction of a person's will. If a person, experiencing a sinful passion, turns to God and says: “Lord, I don’t want this and I don’t want it, help me get rid of it,” there is practically no sin on the person. There is sin - to the extent that our heart participated in these tempting desires. And how much we allowed him to participate in this.
— Apparently, we need to dwell on the “disease of telling,” which stems from a certain cowardice during confession. For example, instead of saying “I behaved selfishly,” I begin to tell: “At work... my colleague says... and in response I say...”, etc. I eventually report my sin, but - just like that, within the frame of the story. This is not even a frame, these stories play, if you look at it, the role of clothing - we dress in words, in the plot, so as not to feel naked in confession.
- Indeed, it’s easier this way. But you don’t need to make it easy for yourself to confess. Confession should not contain unnecessary details. There shouldn't be any other people with their actions. Because when we talk about other people, we most often justify ourselves at the expense of these people. We also make excuses due to some of our circumstances. On the other hand, sometimes the extent of the sin depends on the circumstances of the sin. Beating a person out of drunken anger is one thing, stopping a criminal while protecting the victim is quite another. To refuse to help one's neighbor because of laziness and selfishness is one thing, to refuse because the temperature that day was forty is another. If a person who knows how to confess confesses in detail, it is easier for the priest to see what is happening to this person and why. Thus, the circumstances of the sin need to be reported only if the sin you committed is not clear without these circumstances. This is also learned through experience.
Excessive telling during confession may also have another reason: a person’s need for participation, spiritual help and warmth. Here, perhaps, a conversation with a priest is appropriate, but it should be at a different time, certainly not at the time of confession. Confession is a Sacrament, not a conversation.
— Priest Alexander Elchaninov, in one of his entries, thanks God for helping him every time experience confession as a catastrophe. What should we do to ensure that our confession, at least, is not dry, cold, formal?
“We must remember that the confession that we say in church is the tip of the iceberg. If this confession is everything, and everything is limited to it, we can say that we have nothing. There was no actual confession. There is only the grace of God, which, despite our foolishness and recklessness, still acts. We have the intention to repent, but it is formal, it is dry and lifeless. It’s like that fig tree, which if it bears any fruit, it will be with great difficulty.Our confession is performed at another time and prepared at another time. When we, knowing that tomorrow we will go to church, confess, sit down and sort out our lives. When I think: why have I judged people so many times during this time? But because, judging them, I myself look better in my own eyes. Instead of dealing with my own sins, I condemn others and justify myself. Or I find some kind of pleasure in condemnation. When I understand that as long as I judge others, I will not have the grace of God. And when I say: “Lord, help me, otherwise, how long will I kill my soul with this?” After this, I will come to confession and say: “I condemned people countless times, I exalted myself over them, I found sweetness in this for myself.” My repentance lies not only in the fact that I said it, but in the fact that I decided not to do it again. When a person repents in this way, he receives very great grace-filled consolation from confession and confesses in a completely different way. Repentance is a change in a person. If no change occurred, confession remained to a certain extent a formality. “Fulfillment of Christian duty,” as for some reason it was customary to express it before the revolution.
There are examples of saints who brought repentance to God in their hearts, changed their lives, and the Lord accepted this repentance, although there was no stole over them, and the prayer for the remission of sins was not read. But there was repentance! But with us it’s different - the prayer is read, and the person receives communion, but repentance as such has not occurred, there is no break in the chain of sinful life.
There are people who come to confession and, having already stood in front of the lectern with the cross and the Gospel, begin to remember what they sinned. This is always a real torment - both for the priest, and for those who are waiting for their turn, and for the man himself, of course. How to prepare for confession? Firstly, an attentive, sober life. Secondly, there is a good rule, which you can’t think of anything to replace: every day in the evening, devote five to ten minutes not even to thinking about what happened during the day, but to repentance before God for what a person considers himself to have sinned. Sit down and mentally go through the day - from the morning hours to the evening hours. And realize every sin for yourself. A big sin or a small one - you need to understand it, feel it and, as Anthony the Great says, put it between yourself and God. See it as an obstacle between yourself and the Creator. Feel this terrible metaphysical essence of sin. And for every sin ask God for forgiveness. And put in your heart the desire to leave these sins in the past. It is advisable to write down these sins in some kind of notebook. This helps to put a limit on sin. We did not write down this sin, we did not do such a purely mechanical action, and it “passed on” to the next day. And then it will be easier to prepare for confession. There is no need to “suddenly” remember everything.
— Some parishioners prefer confession in this form: “I sinned against such and such a commandment.” This is convenient: “I sinned against the seventh” - and there is no need to say anything more.
“I believe this is completely unacceptable.” Any formalization of spiritual life kills this life. Sin is the pain of the human soul. If there is no pain, then there is no repentance. St. John Climacus says that the forgiveness of our sins is evidenced by the pain that we feel when we repent of them. If we do not experience pain, we have every reason to doubt that our sins have been forgiven. And the Monk Barsanuphius the Great, answering questions from various people, repeatedly said that a sign of forgiveness is a loss of sympathy for previously committed sins. This is the change that must happen to a person, an internal turn.
- Another common opinion: why would I repent if I know that I won’t change anyway - it will be hypocrisy and hypocrisy on my part.
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But here is a situation known to me personally: a girl regularly came to one of the Moscow churches and confessed that she earned her living by what is, as they say, the most ancient profession. No one allowed her to receive Communion, of course, but she continued to walk, prayed, and tried to somehow participate in the life of the parish. I don’t know if she managed to leave this craft, but I know for sure that the Lord protects her and does not leave her, waiting for the necessary change.
It is very important to believe in the forgiveness of sins, in the power of the Sacrament. Those who do not believe complain that after confession there is no relief, that they leave the church with a heavy soul. This comes from a lack of faith, even from a lack of faith in forgiveness. Faith should give a person joy, and if there is no faith, there is no need to hope for any spiritual experiences and emotions.
- Sometimes it happens that some long-standing (usually) action of ours evokes in us a reaction that is more humorous than repentant, and it seems to us that talking about this action in confession is excessive zeal, bordering on hypocrisy or coquetry. Example: I suddenly remember that once in my youth I stole a book from the library of a holiday home. I think that we need to say this in confession: no matter how you look at it, the eighth commandment has been broken. And then it becomes funny...
“I wouldn’t take it so lightly.” There are actions that cannot even be formally committed, because they destroy us - not even as people of faith, but simply as people of conscience. There are certain barriers that we must set for ourselves. These saints could have spiritual freedom, which allows them to do things that are formally condemned, but they did them only when these actions were for the good.
— Is it true that you do not need to repent of sins committed before Baptism if you were baptized in adulthood?
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— We have talked quite a lot here about how to prepare for confession, but what should we read or, as they say, proofread at home the day before, what prayers? The prayer book contains the Follow-up to Holy Communion. Do I need to proofread it in its entirety and is that enough? In addition, Communion may not follow confession. What to read before confession?
— It is very good if a person reads the Canon of Repentance to the Savior before confession. There is also a very good Penitential Canon of the Mother of God. This could be simply a prayer with the repentant feeling “God, be merciful to me, a sinner.” And it is very important, remembering every sin committed, bringing to the heart the awareness of its disastrousness for us, from the heart, in your own words, ask God for forgiveness for it, simply standing in front of icons or making bows. To come to what St. Nicodemus the Holy Mountainer calls the feeling of being “guilty.” That is, to feel: I am dying, and I am aware of it, and I am not justifying myself. I recognize myself as worthy of this death. But with this I go to God, surrender myself before His love and hope for His mercy, believing in it.
Abbot Nikon (Vorobyov) has a wonderful letter to a certain woman, no longer young, who, due to age and illness, had to prepare for the transition to Eternity. He writes to her: “Remember all your sins and repent of each one - even the one you confessed - before God until you feel that the Lord forgives you. It’s not a charm to feel that the Lord forgives; this is what the holy fathers called joyful crying—repentance that brings joy.” This is the most necessary thing - to feel peace with God.
Interviewed by Marina Biryukova
